Every day we have to deal with things that are beyond our control. These things can complicate our lives to varying degrees. Sometimes it’s a small thing, like getting a flat tire on the way to work, or getting caught in traffic on the way to the movies. These are minor when it comes to life-altering events. Unfortunately, there are other events that can have a more major impact on our daily lives. Experiencing the death of a loved one, being laid off from a job, suffering some type of major personal injury, or going through a divorce are all events beyond our control that we still have to find a way to face.
These events cannot be understood in the course of one day. They require time, space, and self-compassion. Below is a list of five concrete ways of gathering yourself in the face of seemingly insurmountable roadblocks or life events.
1. Make a list of your strengths and weaknesses.
Identifying what a person’s strengths and weaknesses are often the first steps to getting their lives together. This idea seems to be an easy one, but many people don’t take this needed step. Often, it’s thought that focusing on one’s weakness is a sign of failure, or that focusing on anything other than the best parts of ourselves is counterproductive in trying to better oneself.
When listing what your weaknesses are, you’re better able to focus on how they can address them. For example, say that tardiness has made you lose several jobs. After digging into why this is the case, you may find out that you’re just not naturally an early riser. At that point, you can begin to seek out employment opportunities that allow you to awake later so that you’re not late to work anymore.
By focusing on your strengths, you’re able to find those areas at which you excel. This can provide a sense of positive reinforcement and guidance as you seek ways to handle the day to day. We can all stand to hear a bit of good news about ourselves and making a list of our strengths can help us feel better and have a clearer picture of what areas we should be more active in.
2. Seek out counseling or therapy.
Counseling can be a great way to rebuild a person’s life. Therapy provides a space in which you can express your thoughts and feelings and feel safe while doing so. Speaking with family and close friends can definitely help with venting sessions, but many people can benefit from the wisdom of professionals who know a thing or to about the human psyche. If you want to dig deeper into the heart of what is on your mind, then you should consider speaking to a therapist or a counselor.
An estimated 40.2 million adults in the United States received mental health treatment or counseling at some time during 2019, and that makes sense. There are simply some things that need to be addressed by professionals. For example, if you are struggling with a substance abuse problem and haven’t been able to detox on your own, there are rehab centers that can support you on your rehab journey. Substance abuse is particularly hard to tackle on your own or with family, and many Americans suffer from substance abuse problems. That’s why rehab centers, full of licensed counselors and other professionals who can help you, are a good first step towards wellness. Whether it’s visiting a Beverly Hills rehabilitation center or finding a local therapist near you, taking this first step is crucial. Counselors and therapists are great resources through which you can begin to get your life together.
3. Change how you talk about yourself.
If a person sees themselves as being “less than” others, there’s a good chance that life won’t get any better for them. Finding the best qualities in yourself is essential. After locating those good qualities, you need to reinforce those qualities as frequently as possible. Tweaking your language in little ways can help you rebuild your self-esteem.
Using more comments such as “I can” rather than “I can’t” can build you up rather than tearing you down. You should also try to delete all negative self-talk from your vocabulary, allowing only positive thoughts and positive words to permeate your consciousness. We all make mistakes. The goal is to acknowledge them, and then move on.
4. Try something new.
Albert Einstein famously said that “the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, but expecting different results.” Often, we might find that sticking with something that we don’t like is the reason why life is falling down around us. For example, staying stuck in a dead-end job. These places of employment provide no sense of personal satisfaction, are often not paying an individual what they’re worth, and are sources of a lot of mental stress.
Imagine trying something new like seeking out a new career. Maybe you want to turn their lifelong love of fixing cars into a career. It’s easier than you might think! If you go back to school and pick up that AOS degree, you can begin a career fixing automobiles. If being an auto mechanic is your passion, there are AOS degree programs and occupational studies out there that can allow you to get a degree alongside real-world experience in no time. Even certificate programs can be helpful. The simple act of trying something new can be a major step towards getting a person’s life together, so don’t just assume that an AOS degree is beyond your reach. Look into it, and take it semester by semester. Before you know it you’ll be grinning on the way to work.
5. Accept what you don’t know
People don’t know everything, and that’s not a bad thing. Sadly, a lot of people don’t acknowledge their lack of knowledge, and this makes their lives are a bit more difficult for them. When a person accepts that there are things that are still to be learned, then this releases a lot of stress in their lives.
Some people feel that if they don’t know everything, then they are seen as less worthy. This is in fact an unreasonable thing to ask of yourself. Just accept the things that you know, and acknowledge there always an opportunity to learn.